Getting It Done
Finally, I feel like things are turning around for me in some manner. Myron commented that I must be feeling better because I am keeping up on some things in my home. The truth is, I do feel better. The reason being is that things are finally in order for my life. I am actually going to school and getting great grades. Before when I started school in Longview after the second quarter my life turned upside down with the death of someone important to me and then the hassle of cleaning out a 5 bedroom house of junk and treasure. I had to dig through a lot of garbage to find the treasure, but there was some. Then a disastrous relationship with a guy that I believed was a close friend and then the loss of someone I knew was an amazing friend. Like I said a turbulent time of emotional wreckage, thankfully that part of my life is over and balance is restored. Being sick is teaching me to accept that I cannot change things that others are doing, heck, I can’t even change what my own body is doing, so how can I control what another person is doing in their own life. Last Friday I saw Timothy my therapist who complimented me on my courage and willingness to face my physical challenge and not wallow in my pain. I realized that day I have a huge issue in receiving compliments from people. Timothy is not the only person in my life that has commented on how gracefully I am handling my illness. I am like thank, but the full impact of their words does not hit me. It is difficult for me to accept a compliment. I have been rearranging the contents of my apartment, moving things in a different way to make room and to make things visually more appealing for myself and for my company. Myron and I turned my bed in a different position and I am awaiting the arrival of my new bed frame. I bought some new sheets that are fun and comforting and I also bought some new pajamas. I bought new dishes for my new eating habits, smaller plates and bowels so I am not tempted to fill them to the brim. And I moved the big mahogany coffee table out of my room and into the living room. Hopefully today we will be rearranging my living room. I am taking full advantage of Myron’s degree in style design. He makes me laugh, thankfully, since we see each other two to three hours 5 days a week, so at least we get along. Nicholas is not enjoying the movement and rearranging of my apartment. Though he does enjoy the new placement of my bed, he can now lie on my bed and look out the window in ease and still be near me. Oh the biggest change is that I bought myself a new lap top. No more looking at a Picasso painting when I see the screen and having my old lap top hooked to my TV set in order to get my things done. Like I said I am making some improvements.