Last night I spent two in half hours on the phone with my sister Carri. I came out of this conversation realizing three things about myself. One, I have to commit to an eating plan. Two, everyone’s is different with regards to how their body process’ food, maintains health, and what types of food it needs in order to stay healthy. Three, I need to drink more water.
That being said, after getting a good night’s sleep I have come to the conclusion that it is now time for me to fully commit to me. It is time to focus my attention on what I am putting into my mouth, exercising, and also going towards a lofty goal of aiding others in their own life quests.
Saturday when I received a letter from Timothy my intern therapist it caused me to question myself on a deeper level. He wrote: “I know you will carry these qualities and others through this experience: trustworthy, loyal, motivated, compassionate, caring, reliable, empathetic, devoted, driven, funny, knowledgeable, tenacious, courageous, and stubborn.” I question myself and my abilities all the time. I have a hard time with following through on plans that I make. I have a hard time sticking to something and seeing it through. The only things that I am committed to at this moment are my cat Nicholas and making sure I am breathing correctly. In the past couple years as I am fighting for my life, I have had several people tell me all these qualities. Yet, I have a hard time seeing these things in myself.
Yet a switch has clicked on in my head. I am all of these qualities. I am worthy of being healthy fully in all manners of my life. I have an assignment from God that I am to help others realize these same things about themselves. I realized this because I could have lost my voice. I learned how important ones voice is, how important it is to actually take the steps, follow through on plans in order to become physically healthy. My eating is just the last step that one last point of contention that I have to work on. That being said, I am not saying for one moment that I am at the part where I quit moving forward in the other areas of my life. I am saying that it is time for me to add more things into my life in order for me to become the Jamie I am supposed to be. That being said, I am working on my plan and what it is I am looking for when I am going to ask people to participate in my journey and when I get that all figured out I will post it here. I have not left God out of my journey, but I also know that God built us all for relationship. Which means that we stand together to help each other and sometimes one must ask for help. I am learning that, how important relationship truly is to me.
The part of my plan that I have figured out so far is: One I will be drinking a gallon of water a day. Two I will be taking all my medications daily. Three I am going to start an eating regiment of eating 1500 calories a day full of proteins. I am starting this on August 1st. Yes, you guess correctly the day I have my surgery. I figured that will be a good day for me to start and when I am at home I will be incorporating exercise into my daily life. I have been immobile for way too long. That is my plan so far and I plan on writing out what I am eating daily so I am aware of what I am putting into my mouth.
Pray for me and I will do the same for you.