Motivation What Does That Mean?
Motivation, what exactly does this word mean. We have ideas and our own perception of what motivation is, but truly what does it mean? Is it different for each person? Is it only for a choice few?
I am contemplating this word “Motivation” because a friend of mine and I discussed this. She is experiencing not feeling motivated and if I were to be absolutely honest I suffer from this same issue. We probably all do but some of us like to hide it and pretend that everything is hunky dory when it isn’t. Lucky for you, I am not that type of person. I used to be and that has changed.
Motivation “some inner drive, impulse, intention that causes a person to do something or act in a certain way; an incentive; a goal”. You see “motivation” would be different with each individual. For example, my goal is to lose weight. But my motivation isn’t to lose the weight to be some fashion model, or to wear a bikini. It is to breathe better, prolong my life longer, make having surgery easier on my body, just to move and be healthier not for my looks sake. I do know of others whose main motivation for losing weight is to look better, but that isn’t mine. Who’s to say whose motivation is better, not me or anyone else and that is why it is difficult to compare ourselves with each other. God created us to be different, to think, do, feel, and be motivated differently and He did this for a reason. Think about it, when you lose that motivation or are struggling to accomplish your goals like being tired, could it be that it is time for a break. To breathe, and no I am not suggesting taking a month long sojourn away on some deserted island in the far corners of the Earth. I personally would love that. Just give me my sun hat, sunscreen, good music, my cat, and a bag full of books and I would be in heaven. And if you truly want to make me happy how about some hunky guys fanning me with palm leafs, but I know that is all fantasy. I can’t take a month long sojourn, who really can?
How do we encourage each other when our motivations are so different? How do we do it without our ego’s showing and not sounding like a know it all? Hmm, those are good questions and here is what I am learning on my journey and what my goals are. First, I don’t put the person down for feeling unmotivated. Just listening is enough usually, because sometimes someone just needs to vent or to talk it out to someone else so they can figure it out in their own head. No advice is needed all the time. My natural inclination is to fix other peoples issues and I realize I can’t. I don’t know it all and besides that isn’t always my assignment. Sometimes my assignment is to just listen and if it comes to my mind to share my own experience then I can do that. I know that when I am venting to someone else and they say to me oh so and so does it this way and she is doing this and that. That is not encouraging to me at all, because first off, how do I know what the other persons struggles are and how do I know what that persons goals are. That is more likely and it has when I have had it done to me made me angry and I feel like a shameful wretched mess. I don’t like that feeling. I hate feeling that way. I don’t need the extra help. So I am working on being mindful of how I say things when I am lead to encourage others. Second, I sometimes ask questions, just to get them thinking. Because I know that when I am stuck in unmotivated island with the sagging belly and the I can’t do this anymore twins I sometimes need to be reminded of why I am fighting towards the goals I have. So asking questions is helpful. If I don’t know the answer right away it gives me a chance to reassess and make changes to my goals.
What motivates me to keep fighting on especially on days I want to crawl under the rock? Hmm, my cat Nicholas, he usually can sense when I am not feeling well and he saunters up to me and begs to be petted, kissed, and then he winks at me to let me know he loves me too. Do not worry, I am not one of those cat mothers who put bonnets on her cat and bottle feeds him. And the fact that I am not ready to lie down and die keeps me motivated to take care of my trach when I sometimes want to rip the sucker out and throw it at someone. I have many things I do want to accomplish and I know that I will. Motivation is individualized and shouldn’t be a one cap fits all mentality.