While reading “Assertiveness For Earth Angels” by Doreen Virtue I kept thinking to myself I needed this book 9 years ago. Knowing the red flags that creep up when meeting others would have helped me to say no more often and think of myself. I have always been one to help others and encourage them to be who they truly are without shame. I just wished I would have at times listened to my own intuition in the things I was telling others.
I love the fact that Virtue shares what narcissistic people are like and what to look for. I have been plagued with a few of these types of people in my life. I always feel drained. I always feel exhausted, more so than what my disease leaves me feeling. Yet, I did not listen to my body. I kept on trying to be a good friend to them despite them not being that way towards me.
Since I have gotten sick with Wegener’s I have learned to listen to my body and how I feel when I am around certain people. I am happy to say that those who use to drain me and leave me going batty with trying to make them happy and not understanding why they were treating me or behaving the way they were. I have recently realized it was ego based. They weren’t thinking of me, our relationship, but what they could get from me to enhance their lives. Stepping back I realize that is not right, that I am worth fighting for. That I deserve respect and I can do that and still be the loving, giving, encourager that I was born to be I just have to put up my boundaries to let others know that I can’t be the giver all the time. I need my reserves replenished too.
I like that Virtue gives tools to help you set boundaries and replenish your reserve when you are drained.
A great book, easy to read, very insightful and I think anyone who is a giver, encourager, and values relationship should read this and put what she suggests into actions.