I am reflecting on my goals for 2014. I know, it is hard to believe that another year has gone by and so quickly. I knew for a while that my theme for 2014 was journey to wellness. That is what I titled my journal for this coming year. But what does wellness mean and what does that look like? We shall find out as I walk this new path.

To me, wellness means being calm, peaceful, in good relationship with those in my life and around me, fueling my body with nutritious food, and moving my body as I am going through my tasks and pursuing my projects.

Reading John 15:1-11 I am reminded that Jesus is the vine and I am the branches. I need to first dive into His word daily and I have the tools. I have my Amplified bible that I received for my 15th birthday from my dad and mom back in 1990 and Jesus Calling a daily devotional from my sister a few months back. And I know I have ample friends and family to talk about what I am reading when I need to. I struggle with the diving into His word. I get side tracked with my struggles and I just don’t feel like diving in. That is my first goal for 2014, dedicating myself to diving into God’s word daily to keep my mind calm and in clarity as I pray and meditate on His word. I need this. It is a healthy regiment for me. I don’t feel right when I forget and don’t do it.

My second goal is fueling my body with the water and nutritious food that I need to move and thrive in my life. I am reading several cookbooks, as you probably can tell by my book reviews lately. They have mainly been cookbooks. I am finding wonderful recipes that I am writing down to try in the coming year. I want easy, things I can make ahead for those moments when fatigue hits me like a 50 ton brick in the head. I also want economical too, because I am poor, living on food stamps. I must budget out my meals.

My third goal for 2014 is my relationships. Relationships are important to me. They help me to thrive. I would like to spend more time with those that I love and make more of an effort to communicate and share what I am going through with them even with the hustle and bustle of their busy lives. I am guilty of not communicating with them effectively and that is something I know I must work on. I also need to work on stopping myself from being the counselor to them because I want to have fun. I want to connect with them and not just when they have an issue coming up. I want to do healthy things such as walking, sharing what we are listening to, cooking together, or just plain old playing. I still will listen and offer my thoughts, because that is just in my nature. I just know that I tend to either go extremely overboard and I know it drives them crazy. Backing off is one of my goals so that I can have healthy relationships with my family and friends. I cannot fix their problems any more than they can fix mine. I can pray and love them through it.

And finally my fourth goal for 2014 is to move my body towards my two major goals for 2015 which are doing a mud run and doing a bike marathon with my neighbors and anyone else who wants to join me. I got a small taste of walking outside and I liked it. I know I have to move slowly to build up my endurance. As is evident with my new assignment right now I am caretaking for my neighbor. They went on vacation and I have been spending quality time with their dog Pixie. I have been taking her for walks, small walks and I know she needs a good run, but I am doing the best that I can. I am enjoying the morning excursions outside when the air is crisp and fresh before people are up to start their day. I thrive at this time of morning. I always have. Pixie has been a blessing in the respect of getting me outside and walking even if it is small distances right now. I can do it. I can breathe while doing it and that is the best part.

Yes, I do have some small goals, but these four are my major ones for my health. I am still writing my book “Beyond the Trach” and I am happy to report that I have written 75 pages and have over 24,000 words written so far. I am still writing. I am still coming up with ideas and I will be finished by May when I am 40 years old. Then I will be ready for my beta readers and then major editing and then publishing my book. I am also still in the process of writing out the negative thoughts and questions for my cards that I want to create for patients/counselors to use who do not feel like they have a voice. I have an idea. I have been listening intently to my own negative patterns and such and to those who are around me. In fact, just last night I added some more to my growing list after listening to my neighbors. I know this will help others and I know that this is a huge undertaking, but it is going to be so worth it to me. I am still praying, because I will need a website and a way to print the cards out when I am done with my list and then to build a website and finding counselors to put on the website who use my cards. I hope to be done with my list by April and in the process of creating my cards so that I can talk to my Otolaryngologist about it and get his thoughts and the speech therapist there as well as my counselor. Their insights will be so valuable to this project. I am praying about it, as I am being creative. Because creating art is not my thing, yes, I can write, and take some pictures, but what I am envisioning will take more than that.

I am trusting God, since He has given me this vision and idea to lead me further down the path of creating Healing Voices and writing my book “Beyond the Trach”. I am listening. I am trusting. 4 Day

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