Thinking: I have a ton on my mind. First the upcoming surgeries in the next year so that I can get rid of my trach and breathe normal again. I’m nervous and scared, but I will move forward anyway. I am also thinking about food, because I know with all the surgeries coming up. Preparing healthy and nutritious meals is going to be a challenge for me. I am thinking of making big batches of soup and meals that freeze well in preparation. I’m also getting over my fear of expressing that I need help with these tasks and with other things. I hoping after my family meeting tomorrow night that I will be more prepared to post what I will be needing so that my friends and family will know what I need.
Feeling: Exhausted, overwhelmed, lonely, tired, and like I want to stand up and start punching.
Watching: I am thankful I have Netflix. I have been watching “The Big Bang Theory”. I’m currently on season 4. My favorite is Sheldon. I have also been watching “Nurse Jackie”. I love this drama. It makes me happy. In fact, I am expecting Nurse Jackie in the mail today and I know I will be watching it Saturday.
Excited: I’m excited about the blog summit that is coming up in October. I’m excited about getting my flu shot tomorrow. I’m excited about a few of the recipes I have found and will be making in the coming future. Stay tune.
Missing: Oh my goodness I can’t think of what I am missing, perhaps my good health that I used to have and the freedom of not having to breathe with a trach. I miss a few of my friends they know who they are. I miss some people who have hurt me deeply and I know I have hurt them too. They are still in my heart and prayers.
Wondering: Why am I such a fighter? Am I making the right decision about going forth with the surgeries? Should I just live with the trach and give up? I know the answers, no to the last two.
Proud: I am proud of that I am a fighter and giving up is not in my nature.
Eating: I’ve been craving Stromboli, so I found a recipe and I hope to be making it next week. I’ve been eating a lot of rice, lentils, and easy to grab type of foods since I am not feeling so well and money is tight.
Loving: Fall, I love fall. The rain, colorful leaves, the crisp cool air, pumpkins, apples, pears, squashes, and just the overall feel of things coming to an end so that I can have a new beginning.