Many plans are in a man’s mind, but it is the Lord’s purpose for him that will stand.
Isn’t it nice to think that tomorrow is a new day with no mistakes in it yet? Lucy Maud Montgomery
I feel like I have been running around with my head cut off the last couple of weeks with all the medical stuff that has been going. Currently, I’m scheduled for surgery on April 26th to flip my port back around so that it can be used again. I have an echocardiogram scheduled for Tuesday before the surgery and I see my ENT. The next week I start my pain management rehabilitation program which will include occupational therapy, expressive art, Pain management, and individual counseling and a support group. I’m looking forward to a lot of the things that I am getting done. Just my schedule is going to be busier than I am used to. I’m nervous, but I am also excited. It feels like I am going to have a life.
Talking things over with my friend, I can see myself learning to be a supportive health coach for those who are chronically ill and working with my friend Karen Clemenson over at Wellness Works NW. I just have to meet some goals first before I can actually do what is necessary. I do help Karen by writing articles and sharing what I know with my tracheal stenosis so that she can help her clients with the same issue.
Yesterday while talking with Dr. Smith about the pain management program he said something interesting about me still grieving my loss of not being whom I once was. It has been 6 months since I was told that living my life without my trach is not a possibility and that being healed is not going to happen by God. Even though I’m over the initial hurt and shock and anger I still have remnants of sadness. Although, Jesus and Paul said when we accept Jesus Christ as our savior we become a new creature. I just didn’t think a new creature would be one with a port, a trach, a tracheal stenosis, and a funny walk. I’m still working on finding my identity in Jesus and see me as He sees me. That is why I choose Identity as my focus word this year. I’m still learning and a work in process. That is all I can muster to say this week.
Be well my friends. Remember to breathe deep and enjoy the journey.